DFA Writes

February 15, 2007

He sees the naked me

Underneath fake smiles and forced laughs

He knows the true emotion

I hide behind my jokes, my long-lasting conversation about absolutely nothing

He sees me: flawed, so imperfect and misconstrued

He knows my twisted thoughts

My meaningless laughter, my passion

I overwhelm him with stories I’ve never told

Secrets I’ve always kept, blood I never shed

And he accepts me

ALL of me, with my changes of heart, mind and eye color

Styles and names only clothe me

While beneath it is a me

So very chaotic

Bitter-Sweet Tears February 15, 2007

And I cried for you

And for me

And for everybody

Tears bled

Never thought I’d shed a river worth of tears

But only emotion ran straight out of me

Like an animal on two legs

Up and fled

My face

I couldn’t stop it

Couldn’t hold it

Couldn’t control it

Only releasing was an option to euthanize simple pain

Complicated conditions of pure love and hate

Emotion from the same mother

They’re babies of lust and lies

Created as fetuses of the devil’s angels

He made love to the souls that will never see Jesus

Crucified on a cross and people still don’t believe your name

They don’t even cry for you

But tears burst from my body

In an attempt to contain feelings not meant to be felt

But I still cried for you

And I still do

Where I’m From November 5, 2006

I was born from a heart

Bent unbroken

Spit out before the 80s could end

Fetus of fools fallin for love

Fathered by the Devil’s

Most precious angel

Product of America’s inhumane governement

Native of a land where football is religion

And gasoline: Cash crop!

I’m created from dirt and dust

By a Man strong enough to

Set my ancestors free

I was grown in the Garden of Eden

Roots all the way back to Cannan’s land

I’m from bruises and beatens

Crys never heard

Stories never told

But I’ll give you mine

My History

No! It’s her-story now 

Because I’m from beneath a rock

Where nothing grows 

But me

Where the wild things

I’m darkness’ daughter

And the 2nd born to chaos

I’m from a people, a nation

That will never live down it’s past

Present and future

I was born through flames

And cold agony

Lived long enough to see the world’s

Crude ways

I’m from love and hate

Their newborn, called Me

This is us November 5, 2006

Read November 5, 2006

Turning blind eyes

To ignorance

Deafens the world

To life

Knowledge being our breath

Breathe

Strangling air

 From those who don’t want it

Not craving crisp oxygen

Inhaling

The smog of the world

And all its corrupt

Minds of beings

We call human

Untilted November 5, 2006

Floors smooth with white stones

I lie there..thinking….wondering…

Is it worth it?

My life

Living..this long and not a single thing to show

For righteousness, peace, humbleness

Crying for countless nights…does not enable pain

 Nor suppressing it

Why feel for the unthinkable?

Dream of wanting…

Fairytales

True or not

If princes’ kiss lips of angels

Born into princesses

Crowns scream loud of thoughts left

Unspoken

Going through this

To only reveal it again

Enough with us

Emotion holds me captive

Prisoner in my own soul

Because life ain’t worth living anymore

So I’ll use blood to scare away my fears

I’ll close my eyes

To fly away